Kankuro's New Pet
by TenshiSuzume
Summary: there are some pets you just shouldn't accept, even if they are free.   Disclaimer: i do not own anything, except that penguin...that's mine..no you can't have it.


It had been about a week since Kankuro's ridiculous version of baby making had been told. Gaara was finally able to look back at the memory and separate what had been fact and what had been the workings of Kankuro's somehow functioning brain by going to the local library and looking up the information for himself. Once he had been satisfied and certain that he didn't ever want to do what the book said to have babies he headed back to the house. Standing in front of the house he could sense something was off about the place. Was it that he couldn't even hear the tv or was it that the water hose looked like it had been ripped off the wall and was placed thirty or so feet from the house? Water was spraying from where the hose should have been, creating a miniature pond about 10 feet wide and growing.

"Can't believe I've only been gone two hours and this happens." Gaara complained.

He headed up the porch into the house prepared to deal with whatever was waiting for him inside. The living room was a mess. No, it was worse than a mess, the room looked like it had been put through a blender and soaked with water. A piece of the hose that was laying outside was on what was once a cactus, but resembled the mulch they put on the plants out back. Gaara cautiously made his way through the living room and up the stairs. There were various holes in the steps and some of them were missing, the ones remaining looked like they would break if he stood on them too long. Leaving him sprinting up them while hoping he didn't fall through the demolished boards. Once at the top of the stairs Gaara heard some muffled voices coming from Temari's room. He put his ear up to the door to make sure it was his siblings inside talking before entering. The second he went inside Kankuro threw one of Temari's scrolls at him attempting to hit the intruders head but collided with Gaara's sand instead.

"KANKURO! Stop RUINING my stuff!" Temari yelled, tired of the idiot always destorying her property.

"Ops sorry Gaara I thought you were something else." Kankuro said getting the damaged scroll from the ground and attempted to fix it. Temari snatched it from him and hit him upside the head.

"What happened to the house?" Gaara asked ignoring his brother's apology.

"It's all THIS idiot's FAULT! If you hadn't have brought that THING home none of this would have HAPPENED!" Temari shrieked hitting Kankuro again for emphasis.

"OW! Be quiet woman you want it to find us?" the idiot said flinching away as Temari made to hit him again.

Gaara could feel a headache coming on. "Will someone just tell me what's going on?"

Temari paused halfway through smacking her younger brother enough to answer. "This FOOL brought a crocodile home thinking it would make a good pet."

"...Where did you even find something like that?" Every time I think he can't be any more of an idiot he just has to prove me wrong Gaara thought exasperated.

"I won it playing Pai Sho in an alley." Kankuro looked quite pleased with himself at winning something he got from a stranger in a dark alley.

"Can't you take it back?"

"No, once i won it he just disappeared into the night. Poof." Kankuro said making a series of noises and hand movements to show just how the figure vanished. Temari smacked him again with the destroyed scroll to shut him up.

A loud crash can from somewhere in the house followed by the sounds of a large animal, now revealed to be the crocodile, running somewhere downstairs.

"OMFG IT FOUND US!" Temari wailed.

"Will you calm down, we just have to catch it. But we're going to need some bait." Gaara said looking in his brother's direction.

Temari stopped her wailing and looked to Gaara then at Kankuro, and smiled.

"W-what are you guys looking at?" Kankuro asked nervously.

"Since your the one that brought it home and got the house destroyed it's only logical that you should be the bait." Gaara said coming closer to Kankuro.

"Quit your whining it's your fault now your gonna be the bait." Temari said getting closer to Kankuro.

Kankuro shrieked and flailed around on the ground as his younger brother and older sister tied him up preparing him for his fate. Temari grabed some nutella from her dresser and smeared a good portion on him.

"What's with the chocolate Temari?" Kankuro asked attempting to spit out some that had gotten in his mouth.

"He'll be able to find you faster if you smell like food. Besides, who can resist chocolate?" She reasoned as Gaara nodded in agreement.

"I don't wanna be coco covered! LEMME GO!" their captive flailed around some more as his siblings each grabbed a piece of his bindings and dragged him from the room. Gaara grabbed some cloth lying on the ground and stuffed it in Kankuro's mouth to shut him up.

They stopped atop the stairs and looked to the ground below for signs of the scaly beast. Once they were certain he was nowhere around they threw some rope around the chandelier and hoisted the squirming Kankuro up to the ceiling then dropped him a couple of feet, so that he was close enough to the ground for the crock could see him but high enough so he wouldn't actually get hurt. Satisfied with their work they went back to Temari's room to plan how they would capture the beast.

======= Sparkle to Kankuro now hanging from the ceiling=================

He knew that he had this coming once the crocodile he brought home ripped the hose from the wall outside. It hadn't been till the house was destroyed that he had a mini ephihany, or as close as Kankuro could ever have, his siblings may not appreciate the scaly pet that he won and may even turn on him. But he rationalized in his messed up brain, once they saw how awesome the thing was they couldn't not like it. Even when he was little Temari and Gaara had a way of ganging up on him whenever he did something stupid. Usually resulting in him in similar situations like this.

He squirmed around some more trying to free himself only to make the bindings tighter and more uncomfortable. He stopped when he sensed something big behind him, as he turned his face around as much as he could he ended up looking right into the crocodiles beady eye. In his squirming he accidently turned himself upside down making his head a perfect target for the beast.

"OMGI'MAGONNADIE!" Kankuro cried as the crocodile hissed menacingly, opening its mouth wide to reveal several rows of jagged teeth.

================Sparkle to Temari's room=========================

"OMGI'MGONNADIE!" came Kankuro's cry from downstairs.

"Do you think we should check on him now?" Gaara asked, seemingly not the least bit concerned for his brother's safety.

"Nah he'll be fine for a little longer, If he can survive a caged bear he can handle the crock." Temari said concentrating on the game they were currently playing.

After tying their brother to the ceiling they had returned to her room to figure out how to best capture the creature once it had come near Kankuro. That had lasted all of a minute when Temari realized they had never finished their game of checkers, and ended up doing that instead.

"Ha i captured all your red pieces!" Temari said triumphantly, as she did a series of movements with her black checker and won the game.

"Dam, lost again," Gaara said glaring at the board like it had plotted against him."we should go down there, just to make sure he's not dead."

Putting the game away the two made their way down the hall and to the top of the stairs. And were surprised at what they saw. Kankuro was no longer hanging from the ceiling but on the floor rolling around in the debris with the crocodile, and laughing like a maniac.

"Kankuro what the hell are you doing?" Gaara asked he hadn't expected his brother to be playing with the giant lizard as much as running around the house for his life. Though he supposed this was better.

"I'm playing with Daisy. She wasn't going to eat anyone just wanted a playmate," he turned to the crock as it made a series of hissing noises at him,"and she dosen't like chocolate much anyway." the crock seemed to nod in agreement with him.

"Well since you two seem to be getting along why don't you and Daisy clean up the house." Temari ordered him once she had found her voice again.

While Daisy and Kankuro cleaned the house Temari and Gaara went to the park for some fresh air.

"I can't believe what just happened." Gaara said as they walked along the stone path.

"Well at least Kankuro found something that can stand him." Temari reasoned.

"...It's still disturbing." Gaara commented and Temari added her silent agreement, and they continued their walk in the park free of and chocolate hating reptiles and an almost retarded brother.


End file.
